Restrained Speech: "The tongue ultimately reveals what is in our hearts. Battling the tongue is a discipline not rooted merely in restraining our speech. Sooner or later, it leads to examining our hearts." We will look at ways we can teach restrained speech to our children including setting high standards of what can be said at home, setting an example, helping kids learn the consequences of destructive speech, and giving instructions of what to say.
Positive Relationships: "To have your children look for good friends is not enough. They must also learn how to become a good friend to others." We will discuss how we can encourage positive peer groups for our children by choosing activities with peers in mind, making your house kid-friendly, teaching your children to choose good friends, and teaching your child to become a good friend.
Openness to Feedback: "Growth is impossible without being open to feedback. Maturity and Wisdom can develop only when we accept and integrate instruction... A coachable spirit is an invaluable trait to encourage in children." We will look at how we can do this by correcting our children with love, avoiding making comparisons, and making feedback specific and behavioral.
Questions for Reflection:
- Why is restraining your tongue so difficult?
- How do you see your children failing to restrain their speech?
- Ephesians 4 suggests that changes in our speech result from spiritual renewal through our dependence on Christ. How are you seeking this renewal in your life? How can you encourage it in your children?
- Reflect on some of the friends you had as a child / adolescent. How did your friends impact you?
- How did your parents' attitudes and behaviors impact your choice of friends?
- How do you feel about the friends your children are choosing?
- How do you feel about the friends your children are becoming?
- What are some natural roadblocks your children may have to accepting and learning from feedback?
- How do you respond to constructive criticism? Why is it so difficult to accept?
- Think of areas in which each of your children need correction either addressing a trait or addressing a behavior. What is the emotional difference between the two messages?
Digging for Wisdom:
- Why is restrained speech a hallmark of maturity? (James 3:2, Matthew 12:34-37).
- What does wisdom have to do with restrained speech? (James 3:13-18)
- How should we use our tongues toward each other? (Ephesians 4:17 - 5:21)
- What qualities define a good friend? How can you teach your children to look for these in friends? (Psalm 1:1, Proverbs 16:28, 17:17-19, 18:24, 27:5-6&10, 1Sam 18:1-4 & 23:16-18).
- How does God respond to us when we stubbornly refuse instruction? How can you respond to a child who is closed to feedback or correction? (Nehemiah 9:13-31).
We will meet this Thursday, October 25, from 9.30 – 11.30am at 2/F Island ECC. Refreshments and childcare provided.